February I had an interview for camp. When I was asked what I wanted to do with my life. My response was that I wanted to learn to love God better. I don't think these past months have taught me that. I have learned a lot. I
have gained quite a bit of head knowledge, but not a lot of heart knowledge.
In April I was talking to one of my brothers old roomates. He told me to follow Jesus and not intellectualism. I didn't really get it at the time. I wish I understood it enough then, not to fall into it now.
I have realized that I have gotten so legalistic about Christianity, and just wanting to Do the right thing and Believe the right thing. I have forgotten to Love God. Now yes I show love for God by obeying his commandments, but the rules are not the focus, and they cannot become the focus.
I enjoy thinking about God, but I am in the process of being very humbled in what I think. I have enjoyed thinking about theology/God and how it all works more that I have just enjoyed God.
Im not really sure what to do now. I don't really know how to change or what to change. But there needs to be a change. I want my life to reflect an ongoing process of learning to love God better. and then showing that Love and making Disciples.
As of now these things aren't true.
Lord change me. Lord let me fall in love with you and show that love to others and point them in your direction.
-Corrie
Hey Corrie, this is Logan Kistler from school. Anyway :-), this is an area where I too have struggled, well, am struggling. I want to love God, yet I want to know am much about this supreme being as I can. Where's the balance? A wise man once explained it to me like this. The book of Hebrews says that Christ is not ashamed to call us brothers, so there are three familial of the Christian life. Christ-brother, Father-(the father) :-), and us as adopted sons. Think about family, ideally everyone is intimate and knows each other well, but as time goes on people change and the members of that family continue to get to know each other. I think the same is true of God. My studying theology and thinking critically about God is a means by which I get to know my heavenly father more intimately, allowing me to love Him more fully. Loving God, pursuing knowledge of God, I believe, are not mutually exclusive. One takes great joy in the knowledge they have of a close friend, because they love that friend, and that knowledge allows them to love that person more deeply. It's a cyclical matter of perspective. I hope this helped, you're a smart cookie, you've probably heard or thought about this already. Well, belated Merry Christmas, have a great break.
ReplyDelete-Logan K.
Tough one, huh. I think we all struggle with that in different seasons of our lives. You're in a great place though. The worst place is being consumed by the theology and head knowledge and not realizing that that has become our focus, rather than love, and a daily relationship with our Lord. You're in a place where you're hearing God's voice, and the Spirit's promptings as He shows you what is most important.
ReplyDeleteShannon